http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dumncPYPJEg

I guess if I were her I would have been thinking the same way.

其實用書面語實是情非得已。

情況是人們追憶前事時，往往會被一些不相關的事影響了回憶，或是美化，或是淡化。要如實追憶往事實是難事，它總有我執。所以人們只好在文字上多下功夫，希望以此修心養性，以後看事時也能像語氣一樣內斂平淡，若無其事。

最近影響我較深的是一個沒聽的電話。三年前女友單方面提分手，這三年努力改變，後來都總算能接受事實，只希望見面知道近況。可她應該還以為我是三年前一樣，乾脆取消號碼，而在我在相隔一星期後才再打的第二通號碼才知道她下了這樣的決定。

朋友說她也許被我傷得太深，也許她其實已經毫不在乎。實話是，我在乎是以為她也在乎，即使不是情侶的在乎也可以是朋友的在乎。現在她完不在乎，倒是可以死心。自己不太難過，比較多的是嘆息。

中學讀的是Band1，卻未能如其他同學一樣進三大，所以Year1第一學期比較自暴自棄，有一科不合格需要重考。可是也因為我是Band1中學的關係，得到的課外機會比較多，所以雖然成績不好，但還是憑口才得到一次代表學校去開學術研討會的機會，眼界大開而決定好好讀書。之前因為覺得書跟現實社會脫節而玩的辯論，也開始讓我明白到終於書才是更接近現實。無指南針而航，是迷惘無所得的。

Year2開始住Hall，現在離開學還有點時間，每天花時間讀書和教授聊天比課堂上更得益不少。可是現在比之前更認真的讀書，才知道讀書其實也很寂寞的。所謂書中的相知相識不過數紙，但是茫然在書海的感覺卻圍繞不絕。知道人要成熟必需克服獨立，所以也正在默默忍耐。

你別看我寫得這樣平白，可是花了多少時間才能這樣平靜的看待過往對我有滔天影響的這些往事。有時本想多塗多染以博同情或者可以多少自憐自傷，但想這樣又何苦，所以還是作罷。

The days where you would have to just sit in the room and study is hard.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0kGAz6HYM8

Bridge teaches me a lot, and the most important thing is: Correctly assess your cards, not only you must be able to play your best contract suit, even for uptrick, but then you must also be able to tell beforehand.

3NT= > 2NT+1

Some reasons to leave the PTU team:

1. MUN training
2.Election Year
3.Other Part-Time
4.Wang is here
5.I no longer want to linger on their network
6. They always treat us as inferior to them, like tickets.

Just see the cruel word please, sometimes you must be able to see it before you can actually change it

It has been three whole years, and I felt we both have changed. I thought we then could meet up, talking casually about the past. I did have the slightest thought of re-proposing, but then abandoned that idea nevertheless.

She just cut off her number. She still thinks of me like that, like three years ago. Or simply does not want to make a fuss again.

Somehow just feeling to those you loved so deeply, just a sudden you can be that ruthless. It's kind of, inconsistent, and unjust as well in my opinion. But then I am biased.

Ken is indeed the best man I have ever come to know.

Suddenly I came to realising that I am actually walking alongside with many great men.The girl that was the prototype of Rose, Florence Poon for say, is actually a candidate for a Dr Degree. Ken is on hot with 3.9. Leung Ho Ming as well striking 29.

Me just sucking balls.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5m2T5yfgsZ0&feature=related

Watching this makes me feel better, I am ready for a second call

http://wongminglok.blogspot.com/ Terribly Astute

I am starting by body training scheme, drinking some protein builder during my workout to help my muscle recover more rapidly. I know I don't look and hence I will try harder doing so. I would have nothing to do anyway once I am in hall other than studying. This can improve myself attractiveness and my physical ability.

Still teetering on whether to call her again, that last call took my last ounce of courage. Can I have a refill please?

Packing for staying in the residence hall, and I suddenly discover that I am actually quite nourished. I wonder how would things go

1.Suddenly I think that if I just put my essay here, would civic-exchange suspect me of committing plagiarism? It's better to put a note here. It's just some random comments x demonstrating research capacity ( which is so limited due to some semi-playfulness)

2. Thankful to Ivy for fixing my CV, these stuffs are really girls stuff which their sensitivity prevails.

3. I think if I can forget her, I should long have forgotten her (After all it's three years). But then I cannot. All I can do is accept the fact then move on, but can I move on.

Some time I just grief, then sigh and things go on. I still love her and miss her, but then what can I do anyway? She has got a boyfriend, and just me not considering my social status and her intepretation of me.

4.Shit, let's back to work.

The sample writing as submitted to civic-exchange

Lately, the pro-establishments and the pro-business parties have been preying on the controversy over the right of abode for overseas domestic workers to attack the democrats.

Surely they have not forgotten the words of wisdom in politics: “Never let a crisis go wasted.” Just like our last landlords, they are utilizing every opportunity they can get to make sure their opponents go astray. The Civic Party is the victim this time, as one of their members is currently employed by the foreign workers on this case.

The Civic Party is always about professionalism and “rule by law”, and understandably looking bad when the DAB mobilize their grass-root patriots spreading spam posts on the internet, organizing demonstrations and writing critiques on newspapers.

Yet, the funny thing that we need to ask ourselves is that, the post-80s, the group that has been suffering the most under the hegemony of local landlords and malfunctioning of government, is actually standing up to defend the positions of the foreign workers. It does sound paradoxical and actually absurd, but then why’s that?

The simply answer is that a good nation is hard to govern, the post-80s see through the tricks of the populists. There has lately been a rise of the rightists, around the world. From the Southern Europe up to the Scandinavian, countries are admitting an increasing number of foreign citizens, and they are alleged to be creating a threat to the local citizens.

“The cure is worse than the disease.” The so-called threats are not really threats, at least not as severe as claimed by the rightists. True good nations are those who can accept different views and opinions, creating a vibrant and liberal society.

By preying on chances like this, opportunists stir up the hatred feelings towards the minorities in order to gain votes for elections. Their action is creating a new wave of terrorism, a wave of terrorism which is from the hearts of west – those who claim that they are the true protectors of western values and traditions.

It would be interesting to analyze the impact of recession and extended immigration, which gave rise of the new ideas on conservatism, even extreme rightists. This topic, although much deliberation has been done concerning the Nazis, is in the modern days largely being ignored and underestimated in both sociology and political studies.

I am those of the opinion of traditions, orders, social classes.

I feel that I am not in HKU or CUHK, I am inferior.

I am not worthy of having a relationship either.

Cause I am still starting to learn, to know the real world. My eyes are looking too narrowly, my head is not well equipped with knowledge, my heart is not faithful and cannot endure.

I have much to learn, I must make myself worthy of a better half, worthy of a better name by studying hard, being knowledgeable, have a good character and broad vision.

They sound silly but then they are how I felt. Time for mourning is over, now it's time to use the dissatisfaction about oneself to shape oneself into something worthy.

Misunderstandings

1.My cousin says my haircut is awful, which I agree. But then there's something lies beneath. You know we men don't do talking and express our hearts and so on, and I felt that all I can do for my dad is to let him cut my hair, although it's not good-looking, that's the only way I felt I can adequately express myself to him.

2.I think my cousin is brave enough, or just me a child? She just broke with her boyfriend whom she has been dating with for four years, and then she alone is going to have ct-scans and x-ray, a full body check-up to see what's wrong causing her illness. If I am her, I would probably make a drama out of it.

But she's calm and kindly recollects her memories for me :

" I was childish and always being the drama queen. He finally couldn't stand it so he decided to let things cool down. I am still waiting for him."

"So why only learning until now?"

"Because usually it's me who dumps the other half not vice versa, but when I am getting 31 and decide to be more serious about love and marriage, suddenly things change."

3.This would be the year for me starting my hall life, I bought some bed sheets, a blanket, a dirty clothes' bag, two small boxes, two towels, four hangers. I am going to bring some white shorts and long trousers, with T-shirts, and a suit. A computer, some stationary and the Millennium Trilogy.

The bed sheet, blanket, bag, boxes are all white and transparent. I feel that white would give myself and simple tranquil life. A life that I have long desired. I hope I am getting along well with my roommate.=]

4. For three years, no calls, no seeing each other, just me sending cards to her, and under the circumstances that she long stated that she wanted to break up with me.

I give my last ounce of courage, and I dialed the number. Missed call, I sent her a text message, but when I seemed to be seeing a missed call myself in my phone, or a received message, I simply took off the battery and changed my phone.

I just don't know why, perhaps for three years it has been helping improving myself, by imaging that she still loves me and thus pushing myself to be better and better, but then it's also my last and only scar left, a scar that I would need to get rid of to become completely independent. If she loves me, she will be able to wait for the day we finally meet without a date. If she doesn't love and that message is simply a "no", that makes no difference and I don't want to know it.

It's more like, okay, you love a girl, she has a boyfriend. You say well it's okay, be well, and walk away. That does not mean you can't take the truth by walking away, I mean, even though you take that truth, accept that fact, you don't have to painfully prove your point by facing that girl and her lover all day right? That's sounding some psychotic.

A few happiness and tradegies about Children

I have got a few cousins, and they belong to the same parents. I have kind of good relationship with them, and something is kind of interesting going on about them.

My eldest cousin is married, but then his wife, although often preached by my aunt to have babies, is yet to have any. The reason being my cousin is always late for home, and thus she feels insecure, often calls my aunt for help. My aunt said as a wife she has obligation to handle the matter herself. I wonder whether the babies would make my cousin feels a bit more obliged. But then, got a company, car, house, newly married, handsome, it's hard though, to make him feel obliged.

My second cousin plans to get married five years later, his dream is always to study a degree in the UK or Australia. However, due to insufficient safety measures being implemented, he unexpectedly created life himself. Being a responsible man, he has just married that girl and she is going to have the baby born in November. A bit annoyed though, still he seems to be excited and caring enough. A bit unorthodox though, but shall be sweet though. I know he's a real man.

My third cousin already got married and she is now living happily with her husband and her daughter, who is simply lovely. She likes playing with an inflated lifesaver, and makes swimming noises with it. She tides her toys often, when she's leaving she would bid everyone farewell and kiss them on their cheek. A bit naugthy though, she would just play with iPad and eat very slowly.

My fourth cousin got a boyfriend whom she has been with for five years, lately she asked him to marry her, but then he refused and they eventually broke up. She told me that she does feel sad, for she has been with him for so long the years The bad news is that she is alleged to be having a tumour in her head, and she needed to stay in hospital for checks. She told me not to tell aunt as she does not want her to be concerned.

My fifth cousin is still working hard to save money to marry his first love - a primary school teacher, whom I met is both pretty and curvaceous. I hope he can make it asap, I am pretty sure he'd want that too.

Renovation

To my dearest blog,

I confess, the same name is put under use many many times, but then eventually I come back to you because your design is the most user-friendly one. I hope we can make a good companion. I and her are over, I guess, no matter it has long ended or not, I put an end on it myself today, regardless. =] 

Things will get better, I am sure. Let's try harder in my studies, one day I will make it.